Pew Buddies
“Therefore welcome one another as Christ
has welcomed you, for the glory of God.”
Romans 15:7 (NIV)
Each week our church’s Sunday morning worship service begins with an invitation to stand and greet one another. Six months ago, Briarwood installed Dr. Scott Redd as our new Senior Pastor. Since his arrival, Scott has encouraged us to get out of our usual pew and meet someone new each Sunday morning during our “Greeting of Grace and Peace” time.
Honestly, it was initially a little uncomfortable venturing out beyond the pew behind or in front of me. But a few weeks ago, I noticed a young couple sitting alone on a pew just in front of me.
I tapped them on the shoulder and said, “Hi! I don’t think I’ve met you before. I’m Donna.”
Big smiles broke out on both the husband and wife’s faces as they replied, “We’re visitors. I’m Sarah and this is Jackson.”
Hospitality began with a greeting and a name.
Normally when most of us consider hospitality we’re thinking about food and inviting folks into our home to share a meal. But originally the word hospitality meant “love of strangers.” Recently I read an article regarding practicing everyday hospitality. Author Kim Barnes writes:
True hospitality goes beyond setting a table or serving a meal. At its heart, it’s about making space for others—physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It’s about seeing people as image-bearers rather than inconveniences or interruptions and welcoming them. And one of the simplest, yet most profound, ways to welcome someone—to practice hospitality—is to learn their name.
The Apostle Paul certainly understood the importance of remembering people’s names. At the end of his pastoral letter to the Romans, Paul lists 28 individuals by name, gives a brief personal commendation, and instructs the church to greet each person. Read that list and you will find 16 men and 12 women’s names included in Paul’s greetings. He understood the importance and value of recognizing people by name.
Author Margaret Feinberg discovered the same hospitality principle when she registered for a Wake Forest University English class taught by the beloved Poet Maya Angelou. Students in Ms. Angelou’s class spent the first three weeks learning each other’s first and last names and addressing each other as such. Seating arrangements were scrambled each week, and names were repeated and memorized. Ms. Angelou later asked her class why she had spent 20% of their semester class time focusing on her students’ names. She answered her own question by declaring, “because your name is a sign of your dignity.”
Hospitality builds community by creating bridges and finding common ground. Community is that reciprocal rootedness and connection that we all long for. God made us for community, both vertically with him and horizontally with man.
Author Jane Howard writing on community says, “Call it a clan, call it a tribe, call it a network, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.” John Ortberg agrees saying, “The yearning to attach and connect, to love and be loved, is the fiercest longing of the soul. Our need for community with people and the God who made us is to the human spirit what food and air and water are to the human body.”
Hospitality begins with a name, but it doesn’t stop there. Over the last three months, my relationship with Jackson and Sarah has blossomed into a treasured friendship. We call ourselves “Pew Buddies!” Jackson and Sarah now have a place, not just in our church sanctuary, but also in a young families’ Sunday School community, a small group Bible study, and a new member’s class. Each connection has been a blessing to a young couple new, not just to our church, but to our city and state.
Last week Sarah and I were able to meet for a coffee cup conversation. That two-hour conversation was another way of practicing hospitality and community. Both of us made space in our busy schedules to encourage, connect, and build our friendship. The cost was minimal, but the reward was great!
At the end of yesterday’s church service, my heart warmed as I watched Sarah and Jackson reaching out and welcoming another new visitor who sat alone. Our Pew Buddies circle is growing.
Hospitality begins with a name!